Happy Thanksgiving! This is my favorite holiday because it has all the wonderful traits of Christmas without the stress of gifts. It’s food and family and love.
Becoming a parent has made me a bit sappy. I have email accounts set up for my babies and I’m using them as “time capsules”, sending them messages of love when the moment strikes. I’ve already written to them this week to tell them how grateful I am to have them in my life, and now this note is for my husband.
My husband is not perfect. There are plenty of times when he’s not a “good husband”. But he is always a phenomenal father. And I had not expected that. For the 10-plus years we have been together, I have always felt like the catalyst for change. I pushed for an engagement after dating for 5 years, then I pushed for the actual wedding 3 years later, then I REALLY pushed for children the year after that. I literally told him that I was quitting my birth control, so if he really had a problem with that, he would be in charge of the “protection” going forward. Almost 2 years later, we were finally pregnant.
He was supportive throughout the pregnancy and more than I expected during delivery (because aren’t all dudes useless in the delivery room? Not my hubby!). He was in love with our daughter immediately. I even had to mediate an argument between him and my mother in the first month because of his devotion – she claimed he was not allowing her enough one-on-one time with our daughter; he felt she barreled her way into everything and was trying to push him out whenever she was around. He is our daughter’s protector and best friend and he has been since the beginning.
Then we unexpectedly became pregnant again 3 months later. We both freaked out, but it may have been a bit harder for him. This man takes YEARS to make such life-altering decisions. But we fell in love with that new life, just like we had before. My son’s delivery was harder, but my husband was there. Having two very young babies in the house, always waking us up, always sick, always needing something, was hard, but my husband was there.
People who don’t even know us particularly well take notice of the bond my husband has with our children. He gets down to their level, he is affectionate, he plays with them, and he shares our duties as parents like a champ.
My son has been sick all week, either with the flu or some other nasty, ass-kicking virus. My husband came with us to the doctor. He rocked and cuddled our son as he shook from chills due to a rediculously high fever. His heart breaks, just like mine, to see our son suffering, even from something like the flu. And to have a true partner this week has been such a blessing.
For a guy who didn’t really love the idea of having kids, I am in awe at how amazing he is as their father. Our adult romantic love is sometimes complicated and messy, but his love for our children is so pure and beautiful. For that, I am grateful.